Make The Ask

“All we need in life is within our reach but we have to make the ask.”

We all have things we hope and wish for in life. Some want to impact the lives of others, some seek jobs, others hope to start their businesses. It’s all a matter of seeking. We are all seekers and some are just better at it.

In the last week I had a chat with a friend who was feeling stuck hoping to land a job and in all she couldn’t master the courage to make the initial ask even though she knew what she wanted. With the current uncertainties, we are all having some of the worst moments. Partly some of us are undergoing the same because of fear, inability or not knowing we can just ask for what we want and see how it all turns out. In this case, it took a little push, she made the call. It’s in my hope that her needs get met in this case and if not she’ll have overcome the initial fear making it easier to make the ask another time until she gets what she wants.

It takes courage to ask for what you want for a start. Growing up as a “man” there is this friend we used to joke around with and as men there is almost always a lady involved. He happened to be one of the most confident men I knew at that time. He was the one to ask ladies out and I’ll be the support. Well, I happened to have stories those days so I could do the entertaining. One day he reminded me of a fact I had always resisted: “For every lady you ask out, there is always going to be only two possible responses: Yes or No.” That’s the way of the world and with a “Yes” you can celebrate. With a “No” you strategize and make another move. The basic concept being that you always have to make an ask.

This has been a guiding principle for me since then and I can confirm it has served me right. I have asked for jobs and got declined more than I can keep track but I still continue. Some have paid off. I have sent our concepts and proposals to various people for the past three years continuously for which some paid off while for the rest you can guess. In every instance, I either filed the idea, tried it out on another person or developed a better version of it. It’s part of the process and luckily I enjoy the thrill of thinking and creating new concepts.

Today I was reflecting about the whole experience as I was in the shower and convinced myself to write this for it might be the push somebody needs. The greatest win I witnessed was of a friend who leveraged on the power of friends to source for sanitary materials to support ladies in her community. She would have just waited for a day she’ll have the ability to support them by herself which may never come. By making an ask she crossed the bridge and put a smile on the faces of those ladies.

“Whenever you are conflicted about achieving your dreams just know the person who stands to help most is just next to you but you’ll never know unless you ask. Make the ask.”

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