Choose Your Tribe

“Your real life is in your relationships. Find your tribe and love them hard.”

Life is a journey. We are the passengers and as we travel we get co-passengers along the way. Some we keep longer, others we drop at the earliest stop while others we replace in order to take seat. It’s all a cycle that feeds into another and that’s the beauty of life. In this journey of life, we have the liberty and freewill to choose our co-passengers. They are the people that make the journey worthwhile.

Ever been to a place you wish you were with the people you really care about so that they could relish the beauty of it all? If such a moment ever comes, acknowledge that you haven’t made a choice or if you did then probably they didn’t choose you which means you restart the trip again. It’s worthwhile in the end. Last year I made a couple of trips to Kajiado to visit a mentor, friend and coach. He was at his home come restaurant Tumaini Gardens in Isinya, Kajiado County. From the calm of the environment, ambiance of the shades where we had our chat I was lost in a world I wish I could stay longer but then duty calls and when the day is over you better get moving. This isn’t the basis of this article though.

Today being a Saturday, as part of my routine I did my reflection, remembered my moments at Tumaini Gardens and what came to mind is the wish that I took more of my people with me there. It would have been more memorable but all in all that’s the next trip I’ll plan for them. The other day I wrote about my journey with suicidal thoughts and the most outstanding bit of it was my turn around. Having “Shiro” as a friend at the most critical of moments and a loving family was key. Later on having mentors like Dr William Kiarie who runs Tumaini Garden there to support my cause was more than just luck but a reflection of identifying the people to travel the journey with.

I am not the best at making friends but I’m also not the worst at it. Luckily, I have always been privileged to have caring people in my circle and they have always held my hand where I needed them and at the same time I have also tried to be there for them. I may not be able to do all they wish of me but I try.

Often times in life we go through the not so good moments that we wish didn’t have to be part of our experiences in this life. Some we can blame on others while at the very same time we have to take responsibility and account for the role we played in giving away our power that much. And beyond this we have to be the version we love and are proud of in all we do. Living our ideals and values.

Through my reflections I have come to realize that not everyday will we meet people worth travelling our journey with but every day we will meet people. Whether virtually through the different platforms we use or physically but ultimately we do meet them. Upon meeting people we make a conscious decision whether to travel with them or to let them travel another route. In my encounters I have met amazing people, some I have kept close, some not so close while others I haven’t kept at all. I don’t know whether it was justified or not but I believe it has served me preserve my sanity and get going better in the process.

I have realized that we have a choice to live a life we love and are fulfilled with. While we do that we better choose our tribe to travel with. I am a firm supporter of one Dr Elizabeth Wala who commits to her children as her crew. Not only does she make it the best part of her life but it’s one thing I believe grounds her in her work because she outstanding at it.

As you go through your weekend, I urge you to reflect on whether you are choosing your tribe or letting it happen by chance. Your tribe will not happen, if it does it will be perfectly unyoked and chaotic. You can make it better by making a conscious decision on what really matters to you, the people that make it matter and how you intend to live your life with them. I have chosen and still filling on my tribe. Have you?

“I have come to believe that we do not walk alone in this life. There are others, fellow sojourners, whose journeys are interwoven with ours in seemingly random patterns, yet, in the end, have been carefully placed to reveal a remarkable tapestry. I believe God is the weaver at the loom.” – Richard Paul Evans

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