Kindness is no Substitute for Responsibility

“Being responsible for ones own wellbeing is an act of selfcare, don’t sabotage your chance to be kind to yourself.”

If you’ve been a constant reader of this blog then I believe you can confirm that over time I’ve been a proponent of social responsibility, kindness and compassion. I do this because I believe it is important for all of us to treat each other and ourselves with kindness. With kindness, we have a chance to enjoy and celebrate the goodness of humanity. I doubt there’s anything better than that. However, I have come to realize that people take other peoples kindness, concern and care for granted. This is the reason as to why I have decided to pen this piece today. I know we need to be kind to each other but it should not be to a point that you don’t give others a chance to be responsible for their own wellbeing. In certain cases it’s the individuals not taking responsibility for their lives and you come in to support. I am not for that.

In the recent past, I have come to appreciate the fact that not getting everything you wish for handed down to you is a form of empowerment. By not being given what you want, you get to evaluate whether it is an essential in your life, decide whether to invest in it and once you get it, you’ll most definitely take the best care of it. Why do I say this? I recently had a chat with someone I really love, care about and respect but I had to shut their request down. When one person needs something, they know the value of having it and the problem it will solve for them. This makes it a necessity. It therefore goes without saying that they should be willing and ready to invest in it but may lack the means. If it so happens that the very person have a clear demarcation on what they can put their money in purchasing but not the very thing they are asking you for then it shows it’s not a need but a mere want. Living in a world where the only constant is scarcity of resources, you may as well not put your resources into serving that need. It’s healthy and the responsible thing to do. Letting people take charge and lead their lives within their means, buying what they need without making you feel guilty for not servicing their wants. I’m learning to master this art day by day.

As an individual, you also need to get to evaluate what you consider essential for you so that you invest in obtaining it without expecting others to do the same for you. It gives you power to live on your own terms unapologetically. Take control of your life and learn to say “No” when on the giving end once in a while. If they can’t invest in what they need then it’s not essential. Sit back and relax.

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