“There are rare people who will show up at the right time, help you through the hard times and stay into your best times… Those are the keepers.” – Nausicaa Twila
As mentioned in the last article, review of GRIT by Angela Duckworth, I alluded to a question that I was recently asked by a close friend of mine on when it is right to help someone. For start I was thrown off being I didn’t understand the context until he expounded on it. The question was at what point one should offer help to another in any particular pursuit. Should it be after they’ve exhausted their options or before they get to exert themselves to find a way around the solution? Over time I’ve often found myself getting to support at different phases. Some when I get a clue of what they are going about and others further down the line when they actually ask for help. Over time I’ve come to realize that the best way to support others is by first giving them a chance to explore their options and help when it’s necessary. The aim of this approach is to let them learn and handle challenges on their own and find their path.
In the recent past as I was reading GRIT, I got another nudge at it through this conversation looking at what it means to be of help and got to realize that as much as it is necessary to be considerate of the point at which one offers help, the how is also important. In helping if you take it up to do whatever it is on behalf of the individual, you deny them the chance to learn and grow on their own account. It is therefore important to support them through guidance to ensure they have a way of doing it on their own account enabling them to learn, grow and take pride in their ability to solve their problems.
May we know the times to help, how to help and be willing to help in the right way to nurture a generation that thrives sustainably.